Got a call on Thursday from a company where I went for interview about 5 weeks back. They offered me a job but wanted me to start work on the following Monday.

I suspected that somebody actually played them out by telling them he is not joining them the last minute and they are trying to scramble for a replacement, and since I am available immediately, they just called me. So the HR try to put together a contract for me the next day. What reinforces my view is that the HR asked me the fill in the personality profile test again. I told them that I thought I had filled in when I went for the interview, but the person try to give excuse that that time, my form cannot be profiled. How can this be? such test is supposed to cover all profiling as long as the person fill in a complete form, which I did. Therefore, the only explanation is that I am not their candidate, so that they just discarded my profile, but now has to fill in a new one for the record.

But what disturb me most is that while I was offered a permanent position, the probation period is 6 months. It is not the length of the probation, but I was told in the interview that this position was a contract position for 4-6 mths with a view to converting it into a permanent position depending on the situation and the performance. Is it that they afraid that if they offer a contract position I will not take it up and thus use a permanent position to set me up, so that at the end of the probation period, just do not confirm me? I hope not!

I have been praying to God in the past 1 mth for a job with RGM since ATH is there. But it turn out that the position is non-conclusive, and this job turn up instead. It is still a treasury job, but just that I have this uncertainty lingereing inside me. However, regardless of the situation, I am takingit up as it is the only option. Moreover, I may not understand why now, but God is in full control and I believe that He has a plan for me. Maybe this is THE job that can last me till 65! Furthermore, I am counting my self lucky that I can still find a job while there are thousands of people out there now facing unemployment, praise the Load!

I made a commitment that if I can have a job with RGM, I will contribute 10% of my pay to the church and charity, but even now, I will still do that as I understand that if God bless me, He wants me to be a blessing to others. I intend to set aside the money in a seperate account and ear marked it first, as I have this doubts about the situation, so I will use part of the funds as time goes, and set aside part of the funds as reserve till I get confirmed in my new job.

Walking in the airport and it seems a world of a difference it made.

Previously, my feeling is an exciting one as I trvalled on company account. Though I do not have the privilege of business class, but every trip is a type of "bonus" for me as I travel for business, I have a job so that my expenses are not a problem.

Today, it is a very different thing. I lost my job, and now, I need to even consider every cent that I spent. Furthermore, with my new born son, I also need to consider about his expenses.

I just pray to God that things will turn out well for me and that after I return from Jakarta, I can get a job in treasury so that I can continue with my life. I pray to God everyday for a job. I alsoi pray to God everyday for the forgiveness from IN so that he will let matter rest.

I just hope to get on with my life. Maybe not to the old stlye, but at least I do not need to count every cent. I just cannot afford to let my wife carry the burden of providing for the family. I pray to God that what brother Alan prayed for me will come through, whereby he prayed that I will get a job within a month and that not only it being a job, but also a career that I can build upon. I am very tired. I have no intention to leave. I realised that my skill set is really limited and that I need to build up some solid work experience.

I am not sure what else can I do except to pray to God and hope that m y prayer will be answered. I am still hoping that God will give me clear direction. I am not sure if I feel him, but I pray that he can help me to remove any doubt, so that I have total trust in him. I wanted to come to Lord like a child.

I am facing the greatest crisis of my life and if I can pull this through, it must be God that help me along the way. This is my second time being jobless for awhile, and I really hope that I can get back to work by 10 or 17 Nov. It feel so lousy that when everybody is working, I just stay at home and do nothing.

Just received a call from ex-company and she said that they will only pay me my sep salary but not the ex-gratia. I told her I have no qualms about it but would like to speak to IN personally to aplogise to him.

Really, I am so stupid to commit such act which is navie and foolish. I hope that by him paying me the sep salary will mean that he has forgiven me. At least this is something than I can put it behind me and I wish I can get on with my life. I pray to God everyday for IN's forgiveness, and with today's call, I think my prayer is being answered. I thank God for it.

It is really depressing as I lost my job. It is a very bitter experience, and what is worst is that I committed a stupid error. I just hope that I can overcome this greatest crisis of my live.

I have been going to church for 7-8 years in my younger days and also attended cell group meting, but stopped for a very long period of time. I am still not a Christian by then. But 2 Sundays ago, I decided to revisit church and I spoke to a pastor.

I read the materials he gave me and attended two consecutive service and also the miracle service.

After that Sunday, I received a call from a school telling me that they are offering me a job. Than on Tuesday, ath called and ask to meet up. I told my wife about it and she said that it may be a coincident. She said maybe it is the work of xu yi ting when I went to see her the other week and she light up candle for me. Honestly, of course, I do not have the answer.

I accepted Christ and my faith is with Him, but whether if there is any conflict by believing in fengshui, I am not sure. Xu said that I will get an offer sometime in Dec, but I will not be satisfy with the offer. I will also have help from a person in Jan, so she said that I need not worry too much. So with the lights she burn for me, did it actually accelerated the process? If this is the case, than does it mean that the help from that person will come end of this month or next month if based on the acceleration timing? And wo can this person be? Is it ATH, who incidentally he is born in the year of pig, whereby it is the year where people born during those year will be of great help to me? Furthermore, ATH does hinted that he may be looking for people, but he is non-committal, except to say that things will be clearer this week. I really hope that he is looking for people and that I can have a job offer from him. After all, having worked with him before, I think we are comfortable with each other. And I think the type of job will be closer than what I had been doing. So is the job offer from the school the type of offer that Xu said that I will not be satisfied with? and than follow by the appearance of a person that will be of help to me, which is ATH?

I really need a proper job in treasury. I pray to God everyday that I can get a job offer from ATH to join him. And as what brother Alan prayed fro me, that is for me to get a job within a month and also not only a job, but a career. I am very tired and I do not want to move anymore, what I want is to stay on and do a good job and progress with the company.

Everyday, I am saying my prayer, and I wanted to open up my heart and accept Christ like a child. I wanted peace, joy, and freedom in my heart, and I also wanted to off load my burden upon God. I know that I myself cannot handle this crisis alone. I know that God has a plan for me, and hopefully His plan is the same as what I have in mind. I really pray that my sin can be forgiven, and I thank Lord that he die for our guilt 2000 years ago, and His blood cleanse our sin.

I try to fell God and I long for His direction. I am not sure I have the feeling yet. I wanted to speak to somebody with regard to this. Is it that I still have doubt and that is why I cannot feel Him? I am not sure. The advice I got is to trust God, which I am trying very hard to do it. I say the prayer, accepting Christ. I read the Bible, though there are many things I am unsure of in the Bible, and I attend church service. I hope that as time passes by, as my faith grow, I can experience God.

What I can do now is to continue to pray to Him. I pray that I N can forgive what I 've done. I hope that things can be put aside and I can get on with my life. I pray that I can get a job offer from ATH so that I can fulfill my responsibility as a father, a son, and a husband. I thank God that my first interview with "F" company has gone well. The second interview, which is going to happen next week, but due to my commitment, I will be away the whole of next week. Luckily, a phone interview can be arranged, though I was told that I will be disadvantaged because of this. Again, I must have faith that things are being planned for. So I just have to take it one step at a time.

On reflection of my past, I really think that I am a failure. As what Steven said, I seem to be not having good relationship with boss. This is my problem, and I always think that I am the one that is "correct". I vow that I will not commit the same mistake again in my next job, if I can get one.

I cannot imagine if I do other things like security guard? Taxi driver? or in F&B line? Actually not even sure if they want to hire me given my skill set is totally irrelevant.

I just have to pray to God that things will ultimately turn out well, as shared by many people with me. People like Lina, etc. Sometimes I think maybe this is God's plan, so that I can spend time with Lucas in his beginning months.

My life is in a tailspin.... I was retrenched. What job can I find now? probably nothing, I cannot even find a $2000 job. Why is this happening to me?

Worst, I try to trade and make money but instead lost $50,000! what the hell is happening? My wife just delivered a baby boy and I got fired 2 weeks after that, what can be worst timing than this? And to make matter worst, my stupid action make cause me problem later, depending on that guy if he will keep to his word and forget the matter.

I feel so tired and I really want to commit suicide.... if I die, my wife will get a sum of insurance money. I am a good for nothing, those around will be better without me around. But after I check the website for some painless way to commit suicide, I realised that cutting of the wrist is not foolproof. Other way of dying is the same. Unless I chhose to jump off from a high building, but I just cannot imagine the pain. I just cannot understand how some people can choose this path. Also, it seems that suicide is a crime that I have to pay for after I die, by getting burn in hell..... so there is no way out for my suffering! So God please help me! What should I do? I have no job, no money. I cannot just sit around and wait for my wife to support me. And what am I to do for the whole day at home?

I really want to die..... I just do not know what to do with my life. My wife will be better off without me around. I always feel sorry for my wife for marring a useless bum like me. I should be giving my wife the best. Even if not the best, at least she need not be worry for me and we can still go for holiday every year. But know, all is gone.

What should I do? God, please help me.

Another day, another fustration.... why do I need to go through all this shit?

Already, I try to be more mallow and try to get by with my current job. Just hope that I get get by and my trading can supplement my income. but it seems now that I cannot even hang on to this simple wish. I increasingly think that my boss is trying to get rid of me.

I cannot afford to quit now because my trading is still not stable. Especially after yesterday whereby the market just went against me. Still have almost 2 weeks to go, oil futures is down 2 bucks, and if OIH and XLE follows, my losses will increase. Just took a long AUD position, but this is mainly to bet against the 2 idots. Under normal circumstances, I will not do the trade as it is not according to my rule. So this is just emotional reaction.

I look at the wage survey everyday..... looking at the Managing Director row.... median pay is 14,935, and this is the target I am aiming for. With my current pay of 8k, I need to make 7k from my trading. Can I? If without this job, I need the full15k from trading. I really have no confident at this moment. But still, I have to work towards it. As the top students in school, being poly or NUS, why should I settle for an average life? I should be right at the top, but I really under achieve. So this is my only chance to right a wrong.

So if I can make it, I will feel much better. At least I have something to shout about, at least I can be giving out my name card with a MD title without being shy about it, at least I can provide my family member with the good things in life.

So God, please help me to help myself....

My boss just employed a new guy, a more junior person but with fx experience.

Everytime we were called in together. I really no idea why he is doing this. Is this the first step of trying to get rid of me? I am totally left out of the affair in the office. Nobody seems to tell me anything. What the fish. Not that I wanted to know, but it feel very lousy when you are not in the inside circle. And with what is happening now, I really have this feeling that he will one day come and tell me that I am surplus to his requirement. If that day ever come, I make sure he will not have a good time either.

My most important thing to do now is to be able to trade for a living. This is really my only hope. Not only is my only hope to make a living, but is also my only hope to regain some pride and dignity. As a top student in all my life, I should be in the top post of a big organisation. But I think I really perform under my potential. What worst is that I am not even able to find a job if I were to lose this one! Why have I be placed into such a situation?

Now imagine if I go interview for a job, and the interviewee is a classmate of mine? This can happen. Just saw the papers today and a classmate is the executive director of a MNC which I thought of applying for a job, or maybe I did apply but cannot remember. I think this is too
much for me to take. Therefore to avoid such a situation, the only viable alternative is to run my own firm. I can than give whatever title I want to myself. But of course, my business must be able to make a certain amount of income so that I will not be shy to have that title.

A CHF10k monthly income will be the minimum, I reckon, but a CHF6.6k should be the absolute minimum, I think. According to the survey of salary from the ministry, a person with a title of "Director" has a salary of about 6k to 22k for the 25% percentile to 75% percentile, with the medium around 15-16k range. So if I were to benchmark against this, my current salary is definately within the range. But this is not the point. The point is that, any people who set up his own company can give himself a title of director but only make 3-4k. An associate director with an advertising firm makes about 6k. What I am aiming for is the "real" director level, those really in the managment level. So I ask my wife what is her firm manageing director making, her answer is around 13-14k, but they have a housing allowance of 6k, so all in all is about 19-20k. I should therefore aim for 13-14k, which is about 10k CHF.

I will try to strech it to CHF15k, which will be around 19.5k, which will bring the annual income to about 234k.... this I feel, will justify my using of the title MD, and also must be my target. I know the fengshui master say that my life is not very good, and that I will probably not meet achieve my objective. However, I still want to give it a try. I owe it to myself. I owe it to my wife. And I owe it to my son.

Today is the 3rd Friday of the month. I am fighting for my account to close above 66k. Hoping that XLE and OIH will go higher so that my options can expire worthless....

Actually I am very disappointed with myself.... I should be having above 70k now, but instead it is lagging my target. I rework my forecast and hope that I can achieve a trading income the same as my full time job income in the next 15 months. Hope that God will help me.

I get really sick of my boss. I just hope that my trading income can equal my job income, than I can quit my job. Of course, I can quit my job, but that does not mean that I will, at least not yet.
If I can make the same amount of money both side, why bother to quit my full time job? The only reason will be that it is so unbearable here, which sometime, it is. However, on balance, still ok, for now. I do not know how long can I last, but definatly need to last untill I can make enough for me to maintain my current lifestyle. If I can make say 10-12k, than yes, I can consider quitting, or at least I can fuck care my boss... I can hit back at him as I don't need to fuck care about the job...... I am waiting for that day.... THE DAY..... but now still can't, so LL have to take it for the time being.

I am in fact now, writing my dream into a spreadsheet. At every stage, I will reward myself with something... this is what keep me motivated..... rewards like having a meal in a top restaurant, making overseas trip, change my car, even take a course.....

I really hope one day I can achieve this..... I really, really feel like telling my boss off man.....besides, if I can have that type of income, I can print my namecard with a MD title. Not that I cannot do it now, but just do not feel right loh,,,,,

I saw a news article today.

The article talks about the wages of various jobs, and what caught my eye is the pay of Managing Director. The median pay is around 15k. The 1st quartile and 3rd quartile is about 7500 and 22000 respectively, after I check the MOM website.

The reason why the wages of MD caught my eye is that I am benchmarking my pay with them. With my current pay of close to 8k, I need another 7k to hit that level. However, in actual fact, I needed more because I do not have bonus! So if I take 3 mths bonus, than I need about 18,750 per month. This mean that I need an additional of 10 per month. This is a very tough level.

The other reason is that I said to myself that to have my own namecard printed with the title of a MD, I should at least earn a decent pay, around those earn my the MD of a company, so that I will not feel embaressed to give away my name card. I check with my wife, and here company MD is earning around 16k, before housing allowance. So I use that as the benchmark. Now, the benchmark is more or less confirmed by the MOM survey. So I use the 15k as my benchmark.

But for the purpose of name card printing, I think I am going to set a target of 12k. This will mean that I need to make additional 4.2k per month, or about CHF3.2k. I am not sure if this is possible, but this coincide with my plpanning just a day or two back.

If I can make 3k CHF starting from this month and increase by 200 every month, than by Jul next year (exactly one year from now), I will have hit my target. But if I wanted to take into the consideration of bonus, than I need about 8.2k CHF, which than I have to wait for another year, assuming everything go smoothly.

So here is it, if within the next 3-6 months I can earn at least 3k CHF consistantly, than I can print my personal namecard with a title of MD without feeling embaress. Hey, some MD only earns 7.5k, which is lower than what I am making now. Than I shall aim for 15k. Ultimately, I need to growth my tradig account to 800k CHF.

I still have this fear of the downside, so it is important that I hedge my downside positions. If not, disaster can happen if a black Monday event occur. a 20% drop in one day will wipe out my whole trading account! But to buy a further strike put will reduce my profit, so I have been thinking this for awhile and finally, I think probably the best way is to sell uneven amount of otion, i.e., sell more call than put. The reason is that there is panic selling, but there is no such thing as panic buying. If the market rally, I should have time to make adjustment, but if a black Monday even occur, that's it! But a more precise hedge need to be consider as there is no point of buying insurance at a strike that will wipe out my account anyway....

The other reason for me to want to make sure I attain my target is that I cannot seems to be able to find another job at this stage..... sometimes, I really regretted not accepting the offer from ARA. It is probably the most stupid decision I made to stay here... no increment, no bonus, no perks, no more bankers entertainment. What I have is an idiot boss..... I just want to earn enough so that I can quit this job. Or rather, I can earn enough so that I do not need to depend on this job.....By than, I can treat this job as just something that give me additional cash flow... making some money without doing much work....but now is still not the time..... at least one year is needed, but I think the next 3-6 month will give an indication if my target is achieviable... I pray to God that it can work out for me.

Now with my baby boy coming soon, I need extra income for the baby... so this is something I need to make it work.

Again, it seems that fate is playing a joke on me. Just when I think I have "got it", the market slapped me with a reality of CHF2000 loss. When can I achieve my dream?

I am still working on it, and I really, really want to prove to myself as well as to the world I am no push over. But the more pratical reason is that I need the money for my about to be borned son.... I owe it to him and my wife to provide them with the best.

I want to set myself this goal of achieve 1 mio CHF. So I set up milestone as follow :

1) Attain 100k - treat to Shima
2) Attain 200k - treat to either Pan Pacific Jap restaurant or Raffles City Jap Restaurant
3) Attain 300k - treat to Les Amis Restaurant

At least I have some incentive when I hit my target. At the meant time, just hope that the market will be kind to me......

Sigh, my profit earned last month is almost wipe out this month. What the heck is happening to the market??

Day by day, I am just gettingmore and more sick of this working place. I deam of setting up my own business. I dream of just renting a service office at a few hundred dollars whereby I can have access 24/7 and an internet broadband conection so that I can have a place to go to do some work ( not serious work though). I dream of printing my name card so that I can tell the world that I am on my own, giving myself a fancy title like MD. With a service office in town, I can pop in anytime I like and use the workstation to take a rest, read books etc., a very attractive option. But the cost is high compared with other option. Forexample, if I take a season parking at URA, it cost 180, plus the service office at 450, the cost comes to 630 per month. Throw in ocassional drive around it probably comes up to 650 per month. Alternative is to just have the season parking only, than the cost is 180. But this mean that I have to hang around town either in the library or some other places for the whole day, which is not very appealing. So have to factor in more trip back home and the cost will probably come to say 250. Lastly, forget both the season parking and service office. That mean have to make 2 trip per day. So if I were to travel to say the library etc, need to pay for additional transportation, plus need additional electricity bill. So think all in is about 150. It seems that the season parking only option is the best compromise, but I really hope that my trading business can be good enough to pay for the service office. Only with a service office will I really feel that I have achieve something...

But all this is just that, a dream. I still need this job to pay my bill... so what to do but to put up with my idiot boss?

What my life is such a failure? I can emphathise with the Japanese guy that went on a killing spree in Akihabara..... I can understand how he feel. Being from an elite school but face lossing his job, tire of living..... well all these are just too similar to my situation. ut at least I am slightly better, still have a job (though it sucks), a wife (I thank God for having her as my wife), and will be a father soon. I really need to make my this trading business work, not only for myself, but also for my baby boy. I want to give him the best, I want him to have a good education, I want him to achieve things that I did not achieve... I put my hope on him....

Goals

It seems that my boss is renting out this office building and we have to shift to other place.

But what really pisses me off is that I am kept in the dark. Not a single word was told to me. I need to ask other people what is going on. I just wonder why? Why is that idiot managing his company in this way.

It is really of low morale working for such person. Not only is he an idiot, he is also suspicious of people (maybe because I am not of the same race as he is, which is an Indian).

Now I really hope that my trading can take off an I can rely on my trading for my income. However, the reality is that I am still not there yet. Last month result is a fluke. I calcuated that for this month, chances are that my return will probably be around CHF2,200... this is hardly enough for me to pay all my fixed expenses! I still need this job to pay my bills, thus leaving my trading income as my capital and reinvesting in the business. So no choice, L.L., still need to continue to work here and take his nonsense.

I asked my wife how much is her boss drawing per month. She said about 16k, if include housing allowance and all that, probably around 20k. Ok, base on 16k, that is about 2X my salary. Her boss is the MD for the company, and I am just an ordinary empolyee drawing about 8k. So if I benchmark my own earnings against his, I need to make another 8k from my trading per month.

If things goes smoothly, it is possible. But I cannot hasten the process because of risk management. If I can achieve 1.5% per month, it will take me 10 years. If at 2%, it will take me 6 years. But if at 3%, than I can achieve it in 3 years! And if I increased it to 3.5%, than I can make it in 2 years. All this mean that if I want to achieve my goal of having a trading income of CHF6000 within 2-3 years time, I need to have a return of about 3.0-3.5% per month.

This, I must say, is unrealistic, but not impossible due to the fact that the percentage return is based on a relatively small capital, which therefore not subjected to liquidity problem. Moreover, the 3-3.5% is not going to be compounded forever. So I think it is an achievable goal, and in fact is a worthwhile goal to pursue.

I dream of being a stock trader since young. I also dream of being an entreprenuer. By trading on my own account, I in fact combine the two dream into one. So what else I need to ask for in life when I can achieve my dream? Furthermore, with an extra income of CHF6k, I can also afford to travel more often. This may be even a better option given that business travel is not that fun after all (though I do enjoy my business travel when I am with Electrolux).

I have already registered a company, although never have the intention of doing anything with it but just to remain it as dormaint for other purpose. Also, it is a symbolic act on my part to tell myself I am starting and running a business. I have yet to print any business card for 2 reasons, (1) I am still an employee of my current company, and (2) I do not want to have my personal business card before I can achieve my monthly trading income of CHF6,000. Of course, I can always change the monthly trading income target to say CHF4k or CHF5k, but regardless, it should be on a consistant basis.

The reason why I ut it at CHF6k is because that will equal my current pay, and also the combine income of my paycheck and trading income will be the same as my wife's boss's income. So by than, at least if I were to give others my personal business card (which I will put my title as MD), I will not feel embaress about it.

My May trading results is the best I ever achieve, a return of CHF3,810.

Of course, there is a certain amount of luck in play as the market for the month of may does not move much, and there is good for seller of options like myself. Also, the market has an upside bias for the month, so a net long position in stock helps.

If I strip it out, I think my profit should be more like 1500-2000. Still, I think this is a good result for me. My aim is to make 6k consistanly so that the amount is the same as my full time pay. Once I can achieve that, than I will be financialy free in a certain sense.

I am not sure if my good run can continue, but I must keep faith in myself, just like I never give up this dream in the past even I made heavy losses. Not only it is my dream, but in a sense, it is also because that now I have no choice. I cannot find another job anymore, it seems. And I am regretting making the wrong career choice of rejecting ARA's offer. Now, I am paying the price for it, I supposed. But if one belief that everything happen for a reason, and I can ultimately trade for a living, than that may not be a bad decision. After all, my current job gave me the time to do research of trading method which I find it now useful. I may not have this chance if I were to join ARA.

With my baby boy coming in Jul, I just want to focus on my trading, and with my full time job paying for my expenses, I am feeling a little better. The only uncertainty now is whether I can hang on to my job long enough till my trading income exceed my full time job income.

I just have this uneasy feeling, the feeling that my boss is going to fire me.

Not that I wish to stay in this job, but the reality is that I need a monthly paycheck inorder to survive. I may be able to get by in my trading, but it will be much more comfortable with a monthly paycheck so that at least I know that my expense is being taken care of. Also, if there are losses, at least I know that I still have a paycheck to cover my loss in the subsequent month.

I hope I am wrong in this feeling. This will probably be the worst of time to lose a job, with my baby boy coming. Sometimes I feel so useless. As a top student in my university, how come I have to endure such fate. The fungshui master, after looking into my birth chart, told me straight at my face that my career is going down the drain and that is going to affect my every other thing - marriage, relationship, self-confidence etc. etc. The only way is to be above to make money, and for that, I paid 1500 for a pennant. Hope this really help.

I really hope that I can run my trading business successfully. As long as I can generate an amount about the same as my monthly paycheck, I think I should be fine. So God, please help me.

I think I have hit the wall in my career.

Sometimes, I really regret I did not take up the offer from ARA. If I had, I think my sense of purpose will probably still be there. Now I totally has no idea what the hack is going on in the company, since this is how my boss wanted it to be.

My only hope now is for my own trading to be successful. Once this can be done, at least I know I can do something for a living. Nowadays, it is so difficult to get a job that pay me my curent salary, especially with my age. But even if I am willing to take a pay cut, I still cannot find a decent job.

Nevertheless, my own trading has been prgressing well for the past few months, and once my trading income exceed by paycheck, that is the time I can feel relax. But for now, just have to put up with my idiot boss. So I am begining to treat my trading as my profession and my current job as part time, hahaha..... the only problem is that I spent a full 9 hour day in my part-time job and 1-2 hour in my full time job, with my full time job only paying 20% of my part-time job. Once I can achieve my goal of both my full and part time job is of equal pay, than I think I have made it. I than have a choice whether to put up with my idiot boss.

Maybe by than, for the sake of the pay, just put up with it, at the end of the day, where to find a part time job that pay the same or even more than your full time job?

Really have enough of that idiot boss.

Everyday ask me some elementry question, I really have doubt that he is a former investment banker. Why must I put up with all these? Well simple, he is the one paying my salary, that's why.

I am really working hard to be able to trade for a living. At current moment, I can forget about getting another decent job, just nobody will want to employ me. If I can pull it through, I need another 2-3 years if things goes smoothly, than I can make about the same amount of money in trading as with my salary. Than that time, I have a choice whether to continue or not. At least I have a choice, unlike now whereby I have no choice but LL.......

The pantry lady also complaint to me everyday about him, sigh..... but what can I do?

I dream of setting up a business on my own, which is trading for a living. According to what I am doing now, I just need to trade for 2 hours inthe evening if need be, but often I do not need to. The only time that I need to stay up the whole night is on the third friday of the month when option expire, other than that, just 1-2 hours is enough if need be. So just imagine, my day time is free to do what I like......

But this is still a pipe dream, I still need another 2-3 years to build my capital base, until then, just have to put up with my idiot boss.

Another day with the idiot boss

Just when I thought of putting what happened last week behind me, my idot boss step on my toe again.

This time, he asked me a question and I tried to answer him, knowing jolly well that his understanding is wrong. As usual, get a tick off from him about simple accounting... what the fuck... he is the one that know nothing about accounting......Curse him lah.... curse him get knock down by car when he cross the road lah, curse him get cancer lah, but do not die too fast type lah.

My Boss is an Idiot!

My fucking boss is really an idiot! He try to blame me for his own stupidity.

He does not even know the fucking difference between a call and a put. Now he wanted to change the reporting format which is inconsistant with another part of the report, and he dare to say that that is simple according! Fuck him lah! I curse him step out of the office and get knock down by car man....

Sick of working for an idiot.

At least when I work for a smart guy, I know that I cannot smoke him, but the good thing is that he know what he is doing and can teach me. In this case, that asshole not only need me to hold his hand, and now he dare to say I do not know simple accounting.

What the fuck, I am just waiting for a chance to get out of here. Hope my interview with this new company works out so that at least I can leave. Working for an idiot is worst, especially if that idiot thinks he know alot..

I just cannot believe it... it happen again! Was up 7k, and than disaster strike, now I am not even sure if I can end up in the black!

So what when wrong? I really need to pin down my mistakes in order to progress, and commit not to make them again!

Ok, now let's see :

1) I try to trade too many markets and too many different method. And when I do this, I did not follow the rule to the end, especially when the trade show losses.

2) Overleverage on my FX account. This leads to margin call and closing is a very expensive affair because of the bid ask spread.

3) Mixing investment and trading. Shares that is supposed to be investment is being book in IB account and that makes the mark-to-market performance very milky.

So to fix all these problem, I should :

i) in my IB account, I am going to just sell options on XLE and OIH based on te rules. Do nothing else in this account. Keep my focus on the monthly 2% return.

ii) As for the FX account, utilize margin up to 20-30% and not any more. This should fix the problem.

iii) not sure how to fix (3). Unless I open another account, or I use optionsxpress. However, I am not willing to commit further funds. Furthermore, have been buying Singapore shares. Do I really have an edge in US shares for that matter?

Really, I need to focus on my goal, which is to make at least 2% per month, and achieve an amount of SGD1 million within 7 years. Now with a baby coming on board, I must really think for my kid. No more sloppy trading. I have to be focus on the business I am doing so that i can give the best to my kid.

In fact, I want to make a commitment here that I am dedicating this trading profit to my kid.

Really, I I can really make a million, than I can either buy a better apartment for the sake of my kid, or the money can going into whatever my kid want to do.

So God, please help me.

2008 Resolution

2007 had passed.

It is really a year of waste. Why? I achieved nothing in 2007. So I think I am going to write my 2008 resolution down in this blog as I want to make a commitment so that I can aim for what I want to achieve.

My resoultion as follow :

1) To achieve a return of at least 2% per month return in my own trading.

I intend to achieve this by focusing on my core strategy, which is to sell options on equities and FX. In the past, I was always distracted by other trades. So much so that my profit made from the core strategy always lost back to the market and ended up with sub-par performance. As long as I stick to my core strategy, achieving a 2% return per month is not difficult, so BE FOCUS!

2) To be able to run the reserviour one round.

My body is really getting worst. The above use to be normal, but now, I struggle to run one round. So I should run at least 3 times per week to build up my fitness. A stretch target should be to run the Standchart Maraton 10km.

3) To lose weight to 66kg.

While not fat, still overweight base on BMI, so need to lose some weight to achieve a better BMI