My life is in a tailspin.... I was retrenched. What job can I find now? probably nothing, I cannot even find a $2000 job. Why is this happening to me?

Worst, I try to trade and make money but instead lost $50,000! what the hell is happening? My wife just delivered a baby boy and I got fired 2 weeks after that, what can be worst timing than this? And to make matter worst, my stupid action make cause me problem later, depending on that guy if he will keep to his word and forget the matter.

I feel so tired and I really want to commit suicide.... if I die, my wife will get a sum of insurance money. I am a good for nothing, those around will be better without me around. But after I check the website for some painless way to commit suicide, I realised that cutting of the wrist is not foolproof. Other way of dying is the same. Unless I chhose to jump off from a high building, but I just cannot imagine the pain. I just cannot understand how some people can choose this path. Also, it seems that suicide is a crime that I have to pay for after I die, by getting burn in hell..... so there is no way out for my suffering! So God please help me! What should I do? I have no job, no money. I cannot just sit around and wait for my wife to support me. And what am I to do for the whole day at home?

I really want to die..... I just do not know what to do with my life. My wife will be better off without me around. I always feel sorry for my wife for marring a useless bum like me. I should be giving my wife the best. Even if not the best, at least she need not be worry for me and we can still go for holiday every year. But know, all is gone.

What should I do? God, please help me.